11 april 2000 | back | archive | forward | girl | sign | e-mail

"sometimes songs are like bookmarks to your life," said fran healey, the lead singer of travis and my new boyfriend, and he couldn't have been more right.

at the oasis concert on sunday i kept floating in and out of consciousness, guitar riffs and sung melodies conjuring moments i'd forgotten ever passed.

"roll with it" transported me to the trains i road throughout europe, thinking 'oh my god, what am i going to do with my life?' i sat in the company of my walkman and played the song on repeat, and the words, 'i think i've got a feelin' i'm lost inside,' would resonate, but the chorus -- 'roll with it, take your time' -- would always lift me back up.

"talk tonight" reminded me of an evening i spent in london with a certain boy, and the conversations -- through mail and telephone -- that followed. i heard the words, 'i wanna talk tonight, until the mornin' light,' and it was 2am all over again, i was sitting on the cold dorm hallway floor, with the phone cord stretched through a half-shut door, hoping my chatter wasn't waking up my roommate or the neighbors.

"stand by me" brought back images and sounds of my brother, tom, in his apartment singing at the top of his lungs -- i think he'd told me it was his favorite song of the moment. 'stand by me, nobody knows the way it's gonna be,' he'd shout, and then i'd strum my mental guitar, keeping time with him.

it was the second time i'd seen oasis in concert. i didn't really like them the first time (more than two years ago); i didn't really know them. but my friend, joel, who was a hard-core fan, invited me to go. i think his friend had backed out at the last minute, and since we had similar taste in music, he thought i'd enjoy it. i did, and that week i borrowed all of his CDs and made mixed tapes to bring with me to europe. i was going to paris for a post-grad semester.

people often talk about phases in their lives, and i guess that was my 'oasis period.' i still listen to their CDs, and i even have their new one. they will always remain in my eyes a great rock n' roll band. but, as i sat at the edge of my seat, swooning at fran healey's crooning, i realized it was time for new songs and new bookmarked moments -- "there are so many beautiful things in this world," he said at one point, and then sang "turn," words that had already carried my weary soul many times as i'd drive to work.

maybe this will be my travis period.

today is jack saturn's birthday. wishing you happiness today and always, jack!

oh, and dawnie wrote me, and she sounds so happy and i am so happy that she sounds happy because, seriously, she is one of the sweetest girls i've ever met.

i should have written you back, but instead i wrote this.

i never know what to expect at actual.org, and i love that. i feel like i get to sneak peeks at his sketchbook.

"i fucking love britney spears," said noel gallagher, shortly after travis's rendition of 'baby one more time.'

i really wanted to use the image of "smoke climbing," but it just didn't fit.